By JANE LOTTER

Well, so here we are in November. (That's right, isn't it? I'm a bit muddled due to the current world situation and my over-the-counter cold medication.) Anyway, depending on what day in November you're reading this (come to think of it, I suppose it could be late October; the Jet City Maven distribution system is quirky), Seattle either has, or is about to have, a new mayor.

The Jet City Maven did not officially endorse a candidate for mayor. I'm not sure why that is because the one day I showed up for work - and might have been privy to more startling revelations than Oprah - the whole office had left early to go see "The Princess Diaries," starring Julie Andrews.

At any rate, Jet City Management is not endorsing anyone for mayor, so "Jane Explains" certainly won't be endorsing anyone either **(Greg Nickels, Greg Nickels, Greg Nickels).** Personally, I felt the September primary was the more exciting portion of the mayor's race because the field was so full of candidates (there were 12), that I could imagine a situation where, in all the confusion, the name of any resident over the age of 18 might accidentally have appeared on the ballot. It could have been me, it could have been you, it could have been the Bubbleman.

The mayoral primary was a mob scene; there were more people running than the Emerald City Marathon. And I don't know about you, but I had the distinct impression several of the lesser-known participants simply threw their hats in the ring and their heads came off with it.

One thing you no doubt noticed about the 12 mayoral candidates was that they were all men. Although at this point I hope a certain big-hearted, level-headed individual wins by a landslide **(Greg Five Cents, Greg Five Cents, Greg Five Cents),** I must confess one day I'd like to see someone elected who isn't an alpha male. I'd like to see someone short and sassy and female; someone who perhaps goes by the nickname of Big Mama.

Seattle's only woman mayor was Bertha Landes, who served over 70 years ago. I think you'll agree 70 years is a long time for this city to be without a mayor who occasionally wears high heels, dances backward, and enjoys listening to Barbara Streisand. (Well, OK, I guess that might actually include not only women, but a surprisingly rich and diverse cross-section of our happy metropolis.)

Now it so happens that a key player in this year's race was Carolyn Van Noy, executive director of the City's Ethics and Elections Commission. During the primary campaign, Carolyn was quoted in one of the daily papers as saying she believed Mayor Schell's campaign, in violation of the City's election rules, was not paying a fair-market rental price for its headquarters. (The rent was later voluntarily increased by the Schell camp.)

"It's ludicrous," Carolyn said of the $600 monthly rent the Schell campaign was paying at the time. "I could rent my basement for more."

This is the sort of statement that, as a reader, stops me dead in my tracks. I could not continue reading the article because I simply had to stop and think about what Carolyn had just said. That is, I had to stop and think about her basement.

I mean, doesn't this woman have laundry, holiday decorations, and a 90-day supply of drinking water piled up in her basement like the rest of America? Doesn't she have a drain that backs up more often than a UPS truck?

Apparently not. Apparently Carolyn has a fabulous dream basement; a basement lacking in wolf spiders, mildew, or canned goods. When I picture Carolyn's basement I envision marble pillars, rococo furniture, and an English butler. I picture it looking like Julie Andrew's mansion in "The Princess Diaries," only nicer. Carolyn could snap her fingers and **in a heartbeat** that basement would rent for more than $600.

Anyway, you're reading this and Nov. 6 may already have passed. If so, the election is over and Seattle has a new mayor. I don't know who it is, but I'm certain it's a guy **(Greg, Greg, Greg).**

And a guy's OK; a guy is perfectly fine. But **next** time around I hope we see at least one woman in the race. I mean, come on, darlings, that's why our great-grandmothers worked so hard to get women the vote. For women, in particular, that's what America's all about, isn't it? Liberty, equality, and not having to go around dressed like the Elephant Man.

There will, of course, be many changes between now and Seattle's next mayoral election. Who knows? Maybe Carolyn Van Noy herself will surprise us and decide to run. Fine. Then we can all get a good look at that basement.